


The Best Part of Waking Up

by BFWrites



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Ass Play, Coffee, Enemas, Essays, F/M, Inflation, belly inflation, coffee inflation, i didn't rate it explicit cuz there's no sex in it but i mean it's an enema so... yeah?, i feel like there should be a tag for things getting stuck places but there isn't, water inflation, why is essays a tag?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-30
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:14:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,662
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26722723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BFWrites/pseuds/BFWrites
Summary: Jenn resorts to unconventional methods of staying up late.Alternate title: I don't know why the hell I wrote this. I don't get off on literally anything, let alone this. Please explain my choices.
Kudos: 15





	The Best Part of Waking Up

It was 1 am on a Wednesday morning and Jenn was struggling to work on her 20 page research paper on the effect of caffeine on goldfish. She'd compiled her sources, cited them to Kingdom come, and conducted meticulous research on the little buggers. Her room was covered in page after page of charts, graphs, notes, and sketches. She sat at her desk, head on her hand, struggling to stay awake long enough to finish another single page. When her head slid off her hand to smack the desk a third time, she determined something must be done to keep her awake.

Of course, Jenn had already gone with the old standards: she brewed a couple cups of coffee over the course of the night, she ate an energy bar, she splashed her face with cold water from the tap. None of them seemed to work. If it had been any other night, she would've given up, but the paper was due by Thursday. That was still a day away, but seeing as she was only on page 5, time was running short. Sighing, Jenn stood up from her chair and looked around her room for anything that could possibly help her stop nodding off. Alas, the only sleep related item in her room was her bed, which, while tempting, was the enemy. She trudged into her and her boyfriend's shared bathroom to see if it offered anything in the way of help.

And it most certainly did.

Upon opening the drawer beneath the sink, Jenn found a black plastic carrying case with tubes, a funnel, and a metal nozzle. Steve, her boyfriend, had had a homeopathic phase in which he'd bought into the hype that the only way to stay healthy was to cleanse his colon via enemas with homeopathic solutions; i.e. water that had once touched water that had once touched herbs. Jenn had never assisted in his forays into quackery, opting to watch TV at an unsafe volume when she came home to him emptying water into his ass in the tub. Now, though, Jenn was ready to try pretty much anything.

Jenn remembered part of the appeal of enemas was that the rectum absorbed fluids put into it much more effectively and potently than the stomach. Naturally, what was basically pure water did little to the anal cavity other than hydrate it, but other choice liquids could have powerful effects on the body when absorbed this way. After all, Jenn had a friend who'd attempted to butt chug before; merely a few shots liberally applied had left him drunk. She looked across the house to the coffee pot still sat on the kitchen counter with a cup or two of joe sitting in the carafe. If inebriation was possible via enema, surely she could be perked up via her ass.

Placing the bag on the edge of the bathtub, Jenn crossed the kitchen, grabbed the coffee pot, and returned to the bathroom. The coffee was only lukewarm, as she had made it an hour ago and forgot about it in her tiredness and hard work. It was the perfect temperature to be rectally imbibed, if such a temperature existed.

When Jenn placed the carafe on the opposite end of the tub from the bag, it occurred to her this would be challenging for one person. She knew Steve had managed just fine on his own, but surely he must've had some help the first time or two to get the swing of things. Stifling a yawn, she realized she had no other choice. This was the point she was at in her life. She attached the funnel to one end of the clear plastic hose and the metal nozzle to the other. Jenn steeled herself for what she was about to do. She had no lube and was frankly too tired to even run the nozzle under the tap to get a cursory amount of wetness to it. Breathing in and trying to relax, she eased the metal past her anus and into her rectum slightly, wincing at the cool metal. She'd never been one for butt stuff and the burn was especially biting and strange. Jenn cautiously jiggled the hose to see if the nozzle was fully seated into her. It was; it didn't move an inch. 

Jenn was now leaned over the edge of the tub. Her knees were starting to feel it, but if anything, it kept her slightly more awake. She held the funnel high enough up to leave it suspended above the height of her ass. With her other hand, she grabbed the coffee pot and held it up. Then, she began to pour the dark brown liquid down the funnel. It snaked its way through the coiled hose and into Jenn's awaiting rectum.

She huffed at the unnatural feeling of the lukewarm coffee entering her, tickling her insides. Jenn could barely hold the funnel and carafe aloft at the shivers the invasion sent through her body. She hadn't considered it was the middle of winter, so baring her ass left her a tad chilly. The cold metal nozzle crammed in her rectum didn't help matters. As the last of the liquid poured into the funnel, she set down the pot and felt it enter her, leaving her feeling slightly full. Steve had told her enemas made you feel like you really had to shit and she concurred. Of course, she considered, this being a coffee enema, the effect would probably be triple-fold. 

Still, it wasn't nearly as bad as she'd anticipated. Jenn set the wet funnel and hose down in the tub and sat up slightly so that all of her body but her legs was horizontal, laying against the tub's edge.

Now, since this was Jenn's first foray into enemas and she had no training, her next move could be chalked up to her inexperience; however, if we're being honest, she was just really fucking dumb. Because instead of reaching inside herself to directly remove the metal nozzle or even the hose from right next to it, she yanked the hose from a few feet away from her rear. The effect of this was instead of neatly removing both nozzle and hose, only the hose came away after a few seconds of tugging. The tugging also caused a curious effect to the nozzle. Before she so unceremoniously ripped the hose out, if she had nudged the nozzle out, it would've come out of her with ease. As the hose was tugged from her, it jostled the metal nozzle just so in her rectum, leaving it thoroughly jammed in her.

For a split second after removing the hose, Jenn smiled, stood up, and dropped it into the tub to be cleaned later. Then, her eyes widened. She still felt the metal piece wedged into her ass. While she was slowly getting used to its presence within her, it still smarted a bit and felt wrong. Reaching behind herself once more, she stuck her fingers inside her rectum to try to remove the invader. Once more, due to her inexperience and the swelling it caused, the metal nozzle wouldn't budge. She frowned and fussed as she fidgeted her finger in her fanny, but still the implement remained unmoved. Then, it occurred to Jenn this may be a blessing in disguise.

She remembered Steve saying the homeopathic group he'd followed believed in leaving their remedies within themselves for hours at a time for the optimal effect. For that reason, their patent-pending enema bag came with a nozzle that would let liquid in, but not out. As she stifled yet another yawn, Jenn determined the effects of her coffee enema must take some time to accumulate, so leaving the nozzle inside her would benefit her. Sure enough, not a drip of coffee had exited her ass as she stood up and pulled her pants back up. Bending and walking were now much more interesting, as she felt the nozzle twist at every gyration of her hips and legs. Looking down, she saw her belly had a slight paunch to it that hadn't been there minutes ago. She smirked and returned to her desk.

Upon sitting down, Jenn quickly discovered she couldn't get any work done until her experiment was over. As soon as her ass touched the wooden chair, the nozzle pressed just so and made sitting incredibly uncomfortable. She was never one to stand and type. Besides, her constant shuffling of papers on her desk and floor made standing for this work nearly impossible. Exasperated, Jenn gently stood up and walked back to the kitchen, pacing. Surely, any moment now, the caffeine would work its way into the walls of her colon and perk her up enough to finish her work. Just one more second and the Folgers in her bright red, puckered cup would make her jittery and ready to write.

After five minutes of pacing, yawning, and nearly falling asleep while standing, Jenn decided to put the nozzle wedged in her ass to use once more.

It was a true sign of Jenn's desperation and exhaustion that this entire event took place. For as she opened the bag of coffee and spooned more of it into her coffee maker, she failed to see the same word that had been printed on it an hour ago when she'd first brewed herself a cup. A word that made all the difference over the next few hours.

Decaf.

But, as we've said, Jenn was blissfully unaware of this silly little word and listened to the steady drip of another four cups of coffee steadily build up in the pot. After it was finished, Jenn took the pot and began to trudge back to the bathroom. In a moment of genius amidst several hours of idiocy, Jenn stopped midway as she spied the wisps of steam coming off the piping hot coffee. She could drink a cup pretty quickly after it was brewed, but she had a feeling her butt did not have a similar tolerance of hot beverages. She made her way back to the kitchen, opened the freezer, and plopped a handful of ice cubes into the pot. They took almost no time to melt and left the carafe no longer steaming, but still warm.

Satisfied, Jenn once again stamped over to the bathtub, set down the coffee pot, and pushed down her pants. Leaning over the side, she grabbed the hose and lined it up to the metal nozzle still crammed inside her rectum. It took a little pushing as the section of her ass immediately before the nozzle was slightly inflamed from its new guest, but the hose finally fixed itself against the metal piece. 

Once more, Jenn held up the funnel, grabbed the carafe, and poured what she believed was her liquid salvation into the funnel. Her eyes bugged out as she felt the same pressure as before, only now the liquid was much warmer. It was just on this side of unbearable, but that was the best part. With how bad the insulation was in her cramped, old ranch house, the warm coffee trickling into her body felt heavenly. So blissed out was Jenn that she didn't notice how huge her belly was becoming. It now pushed against the edge of the tub and hung down toward her crotch as it had no room to grow directly outward due to her position. With the amount of pressure already being exerted on her colon, her belly being shoved against the edge of the tub felt like a blip.

As the last of the coffee worked its way into Jenn's rectum, she sighed. She hoped the warmth lasted long enough and that this would be the last push to keep her up. Still, as she struggled to keep her head from bumping against the side of the tub in her exhaustion, she had her doubts. Setting down the funnel and coffee pot, Jenn went to stand up and found it more difficult than the last time she'd finished rectally imbibing coffee. Looking down, she gasped at the size of her decaffeinated belly. She was only just able to see her toes peeking out beneath the fleshy mound. Gently, curiously, she poked what was previously a paunch and was now a full-on gut. Her finger went in only slightly. Even more curious, she slapped the front of her new form and heard the gurgle of a disturbed air pocket moving to some other part of her intestine.

Jenn stuck her hand between her crack, sure all this new weight must have put enough pressure on the metal nozzle to cause even a slight leak; however, she had well and truly jammed it within herself to the point that even 6 cups of coffee sitting upon it couldn't dislodge it. Jenn had to hand it to Steve; this enema business was thoroughly enjoyable and relaxing.

While stifling the 107th yawn that night with the hand that hadn't recently been stuck in her rectum, Jenn turned back to the coffee maker. While she was still far too tired and inept to realize she'd poured several cups of decaf coffee into her ass, she more or less knew her plan to stay awake was in vain. But the warmth of the brew sitting in her belly made her realize she didn't care. For a third time that night, Jenn returned the carafe to its seat in the coffee maker and filled it with water. Grabbing the bag of coffee, she lifted the spoon to it and paused. Peering into the bag, she dropped the spoon on the counter and dumped the entire bag into the filter.

\---------------------

"Honey, I'm home!" yelled Steve as he closed the front door. He'd just finished his night shift at the distribution center and knew his girlfriend would be up working on her essay all night. 

Taking off his boots, he didn't hear a sound. Surely Jenn was still home. The kitchen light was on, their bedroom door was open with its light on, the coffee maker was on and indicating it needed more water. Curiously, the carafe was gone. Steve walked to the bedroom, but found nothing but a wasteland of papers and an open laptop. Then, he noticed the bathroom light was on and the door ajar. Cracking it open, he gasped.

Jenn laid in the bathtub, her rounded belly stretching from side to side and nearly from front to back. She was reclined on top of it, her feet pressed to the back of the tub, just touching the edge of her belly, to angle herself slightly upward. The funnel Steve recognized from his old enema kit laid atop the top left section of Jenn's mass, lightly clutched by her sleeping hand. Trailing from it was a hose that coiled around and around until it reached Jenn's ass, which was perched upon her gravid belly. It sat just low enough that gravity had been able to carry piping hot joe from the funnel above to the rectum below. With her legs open on top of her caffeinated mound, Steve saw the metal nozzle firmly seated in Jenn's ass, the red swelling around it leaving little chance the pressure behind it could shoot it out.

Steve shook Jenn's shoulder, rolling her on her own belly and making her coffee-infused intestines jiggle her entire form. Jenn slowly woke and looked up to Steve's worried face. "Mornin'...."

"Jenn, what are you doing?"

She frowned slightly and laid her head back down on her cushy stomach, finding another especially warm patch to nuzzle against. "Trying to stay awake. Gotta finish the essay."

"Well, you're doing a great job of it. Is this-" Steve poked her belly, issuing a ripple and gurgle of gas through the watery mass "-all coffee?"

"Mmhmm...."

"The coffee I got last week?"

"Mmhmm...."

"Jenn, that's decaf."

Jenn screamed.


End file.
